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Why I Procrastinate (An In-Depth Analysis)


Zachary Denysenko

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Procrastination. Really, it's responsible for so much (or so little?). Turns out, It is easily explained by physics! Newton himself theorized that AN OBJECT AT REST WILL STAY AT REST UNTIL ACTED UPON BY AN OUTSIDE FORCE. Turns out I'm not lazy! When I lay in bed while I know i could be productive, It's not my fault. Physics says that I won't move until an outside force makes me. Typically this force is my parents after viewing the infinite campus portal.

As sit at my desk, distractions seem to be everywhere. I tend to choose to launch eraser pieces into the waste basket instead of working. Turns out physics can explain this one too! Projectiles paths can be determined using kinematic equations. There are separate tables for vertical and horizontal components, and velocity (initial and final), acceleration, distance, time can all be found. Knowing this, I have no choice but to spend the next 3 hours determining exactly what velocity to apply to the eraser so that it lands in the wastebasket every time.

Another reason to procrastinate is how much work it actually is to type. Every tap of my finger completes the F=ma equation. That means to achieve the necessary force to tap a key, I have to apply acceleration to the mass of my finger. Every. Single. Time. Pondering that alone just led me to procrastinate from this post for 10 minutes.

Clearly, I the reason I procrastinate lies within physics itself. I am not to blame.

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