When a third grader was asked to cite Newton's first law, she said, "Bodies in motion remain in motion, and bodies at rest stay in bed unless their mothers call them to get up."
Q: What is the name of the first electricity detective?
A: Sherlock Ohms
A neutron walked into a bar and asked, "How much for a drink?" The bartender replied, "For you, no charge."
Have you heard that entropy isn't what it used to be?
Q: How many theoretical physicists specializing in general relativity does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Two. One to hold the bulb and one to rotate the universe.
Does a radioactive cat have 18 half-lives?
Q: What did Donald Duck say in his graduate physics class?
A: Quark, quark, quark!